Self Care and New Moms, You ARE NOT SELFISH!

Let me set the stage by saying: as I write this my baby is one week old , curled up on my chest, passed out, milk drunk, and breathing with her mouth open just like my husband. I look at her face and cannot imagine that it is even remotely possible to love her more than I already do. She is the spitting image of my husband, my best friend in the entire world, and myself, what more can I ask for. We often discuss how amazing it is that the two of us were able to create this tiny human together!

Baby Melina Kalantzis

Having a baby has been a huge change for my husband and I to say the least. Before the baby came, we were able to sleep whenever we wanted, come and go as we please, and not have to worry about much. After all,  it is a huge life change and  it is so easy to be overcome by stress as these things are happening and even easier to forget about your needs or your partners needs as you are fulfilling the needs of this tiny human.

I made a promise to myself as I started this journey that I would not forget about my own wellbeing, my husba1457582_10153499399159006_3997933670385101150_nnd’s wellbeing, and our marriage as we sorted out what this would look like for us. I think too often when life spins out of control our own wellbeing is the first thing that goes.

When I first found out I was pregnant I decided I would continue to workout, eat well, and continue life as normal, with some restrictions of course, in order to ensure that I was still caring for myself. Of course I heard much push back from many people around me on the lifestyle I had chosen,but that didn’t matter to me, what mattered  most was that I was taking care of myself.

Fast forward ten months and the birth actually wasn’t that bad compared to some of the horror stories I’ve been told by other moms. My doctor told me that one of the reasons why the delivery went so well was  because of the way I cared for myself in pregnancy .

As I move from prenatal to postpartum I   will continue to care for myself and you can too! 


Mom and Melina taking a walk in the hospital

How will I continue to make myself these promises? 

  • I start each day reminding myself what I am grateful for, grounding myself in my blessings.
  • I shower, shave, put lotion on, toss on a bit of make-up, change my clothes, and style my hair daily. I think that as new moms we often forget how important it is. I try to make this time more like a 20-30 minute spa experience for myself. My favorite part of this is my scrub by Simple Sugars, you can check them out here. They are a small company that focuses on putting out amazing, crap-free products.
  • I honor my body with movement. I will be the first to tell you that the movement I engage in now is much different than pre-pregnancy but I will get back to that once I am healed. This week’s movement is focused on breathing, alignment, and restoring my body. Movement is something that is so important to me, not only for physical fitness but mental health as well. My movement allows me to clear my head, let out frustrations, and refocus myself. It is easy to say that it is hard to find time as a new parent, but I promise, it is worth it.
  • I consistently feed myself with delicious and nutritious food. Melina is getting her nutrients from what I eat but my nutrition is equally as important. It is easy to forget to eat, especially when you are running on someone else’s feeding schedule, but remember if you don’t eat you won’t be able to be at your best either.
  • I give my husband attention separate from the baby. We are of course one happy family but it is important to nurture our relationship as well. We agreed to have a weekly date night, even if we cannot go out, to give each other the adult time that we need. It doesn’t have to be anything too extravagant. This week we are going to have a movie night with pizza just like we did pre-baby and next week we will go out for dinner and a glass of wine.
  • I ask for help when needed. We are fortunate enough to be surrounded by friends and family who are more than willing to help. If having someone come over for a half hour or an hour so you can take a nap, take care of yourself, or just take a breath, that is totally fine.

If you are not at your best then who is going to be able to take care of the ones that you love? Don’t convince yourself that taking that extra long shower, going to the gym, splurging on something at the mall, taking a night out with your husband, or throwing on some make-up is selfish or a waste of your time. You need to care for you, first and foremost, before you can effectively care for others.

As a new mom it is so easy to forget about yourself, but remember if you do not take care of you who is going to?


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